blaaa

There are times when you know everything.. Why are you living for , what you want from your life, what you want to do, what you want to say, what you want to reach for... Then everything what you do.. there is soul in it.. The point is that then you're fired up, that you believe in what you're doing,  and it makes you want to get up every morning and just go.. go into your life.. And actually I'm missing all of that.. And don't know what to do. .
I know only that.. that I know nothing.. I don't know what I want to do with my life..   I don't know what I want to reach for..  I just want to do nothing.. I want to go out in my dreamspace  and never come back from it .. just be with my nightmares.. Only there I can forget everything and live another life..
I really want to stay in my bed all day and do nothing.. Ignore everyone.. Because these thoughts keep holding me.. It's like ' What am I doing here? Why am I here? What should I do? Am I wasting my time? Why I'm doing it..?' And  then I don't know what to do... just want to disappear... to nowhere..do not exist.