Where is my mind?

Apsupta patalų guliu tamsoje.. paskendus svajose.. toje žudančioje migloje..  Pabudus iš sapnų , kuriuose randu Tave.. Mieliausi košmarai.. gyvenu juose.. Kiekvieną naktį su Tavim ar be Tavęs.. iš lėto žudau .. save kiekvienam sapne.. Nubudus suprantu, kad čia ir yra ta vieta.. į kurią žmonės bijo papult numirę .. Kiekvieną rytą mirštu vis iš naujo. Apmaudu, tiesa? Bet čia jau pasakojimas kiek kitas.. Žiūriu į Tave.. tam vienišam liūdnam lange.. O gal tai tik šešėlis tamsoje.. juk tu ne čia.. Taip.. aš juk negaliu matyti tavų gilių akių.. kurios kaskart nuneša mane į giliausius jausmų vandenynus.. juk negaliu paliest tavų švelnių lūpų.. kurios kaskart priverčia užmiršti visą  pasaulį.. ir ta šypsena.. heh.. ta nuostabi šypsena.. kuri šildo mano pasaulį.. kuri priverčia mano užšalusią širdį vėl pašėlusiai plakti.. ta siela.. kurios nesinori paleisti.. be galo graži ir tyra.. prie kurios baisu prisiliesti.. nes mano rankų galia.. jos viską griauna aplink mane..   Sustingus žiūriu .. į tą išlikusį miražą galvoje.. pasirodo ir žmogus gali būti tyrai laimingas bent akimirką.. Thank you for everything. 

Death

I'm going through the mirror. Again.. Passed and stopped.. Started to gaze. And this time it feels different . Kinda different from the last time.. when I looked at myself. Now I look kinda different .. strangely happy. With a stupid smile in my face. I feel strange. In a good way. New life, new memories, friends .. But suddenly I remembered. Remembered something.. something from my past. Truly, I don't know what it was. I can't see it clearly. I even don't know if it has a view. It's more like a feeling. Strange..  past feeling. And I'm feeling it again... I fell to the ground..  I was wrapped in a shroud of mystery..  it was wresting the truth out of me..

 I didn't want to believe.. I didn't want to remember. . But that pain was growing and growing.. I couldn't endure it ..   It was tearing me to pieces.  My  heart was pricked all over and I started to bleed. That strange girl in the mirror was bleeding..  And I knew, that I can't help her.. I even couldn't see how I can help myself.. I saw how she drown in her own pretty red blood..slowly.. in a lot of pain.. I didn't want to see all of this.. But I couldn't move.. I even couldn't  budge a finger.. All my body was like an icy stone..I was in cold..

I started to think..to think, that I need to move.. I need to stand up.. I need to forget the past.. I need to live..I need to break that mirror... And with these thoughts, when the smithereens of mirror were slowly falling to the marble ground  .. something died inside of my soul..